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If you’re trying pegging for the first time and your partner is not used to thrusting, this is a great time to talk about how you usually have sex, and what you think could work and what wouldn’t. But remember, there are no shortcuts and nothing beats good, honest bedroom communication – and good dirty talk does count as good communication.

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Many people aren’t so good at picking up dropped hints or reading the subtlety of your body language, so telling them directly and explicitly that you want it is the only failsafe approach, plus it means you’re able to talk about things like possible boundaries, previous experiences, etc. You can ask your partner explicitly while you’re already having sex, which many people might find feels more comfortable and natural. So exactly as above, there are several options available: ask them directly during sex or foreplay, bring it up beforehand via text or email, or show your partner what you want by paying their butt some extra attention during foreplay and gauging the reaction.

However, it doesn’t exactly make it easy to have an extended conversation about the aforementioned boundaries or reservations you may have if you’re an anal sex beginner. One of our favorite sex positions for initiating anal sex is in the spooning position.

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