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Also, thank you for taking the time to read this during work. Also if you’d like to take this opportunity to tell your female single co-workers about this blog, and ask them if they want to date me, I wouldn’t be mad. Fuck Eharmony.com, which I couldn’t believe was still available. Now the tricky thing about eharmony is, it takes two to tango.

If that’s the case, please scroll down like 2 inches (that’s what she said) and get those words off your screen. Other titles include: “Dear Eharmony, because of you I’m going to have to reproduce through mitosis” “Dear Eharmony, I just bought the domain name Fuck Eharmony.com, no seriously, I did”| “Dear Eharmony, you took my money, dignity, and self respect, and all I got was this lousy blog” It’s true, I actually did buy the domain name So the purpose, the essence, of this blog, is that my eharmony subscription is ending this month. This is my second stint on eharmony.com, this last stint I signed up for 6 months. At first it’s awesome you have matches sent to you, which you review and if you like you can proceed to step 1, which is you send them multiple choice questions.

A shyster car salesman tries to get her to pay an astounding $18,999 for a new car, but that’s when she heads to Thunderbolt for a rebuilt motor and transmission—with free towing!

The ending is what made the commercial so great: As our blonde heroine drives off, waving her cowboy hat, the song goes, “We put the yeeeeeeeeeeeee-haw back in your motor and transmission!

You can’t proceed to the next awkward stage of eharmony until the other person responds back.