If you are dating or planning to marry a widow or widower, here are some suggestions and thoughts to consider.
LEARN ALL ABOUT GRIEF Do some research about grief, read books and talk to others in similar situations.
Simply ask your questions respectfully, so it is not regarded as prying but as a genuine interest in the deceased spouse and their relationship.
TALKING ABOUT A LATE SPOUSE: SHOULD YOU ASK QUESTIONS? If a couple were married at a young age, married a long time, or have children/grandchildren, it is going to be very difficult to talk about his/her life without mentioning a late spouse.
This can only be threatening to you, if you allow it to be. He or she is not coming back, so you are not going to lose your new mate to him or her. In general, when you get to know someone you want to share your past with him or her. This time it just happens to include a person that is no longer alive.
as well as first hand experience as a member of the population in question. I'll admit that those who date widowed people is not a group I have chosen to speak to or for...
Abel is far from the only author tackling this subject: in addition to his two books, Dating a Widower and Marrying a Widower, there is Julie Donner Anderson's Past: Perfect! and that knowing how few men under 55 are widowed compared to women (at one time Social Security told me it was 1 man to 7 women) makes me quite skeptical...
While dating a widower with children can present it own set of challenges, particularly if the passing of his spouse was recent or unexpected, it is still possible to develop a warm and fulfilling relationship.